day 20, other stuffs
weather glorious but I really feel like crap. Got my depression appointment tomorrow—only taken a month, and still haven’t heard from the cardiologist—and frankly the depression appointment can’t come fast enough. I know it’s not fun to read about—I have hated to read other depression posts on my LJ from others, but I suppose we write just to write, not specifically to be read. “In a black hole” isnt really summing it up at the moment. at the beginning of the year i felt down in the dumps. Now, I’d have to climb to get up to the dumps.Even though the weather is PERFECT and entirely tailored for me, 19 degrees with a nice cool breeze., I was on the beach the other day, sun shining and Sasha running around wagging her tail and being as happy as a sandboy whatever that is, and all i wanted to do was to bury myself in the sand and cry.
ok that’s enough of that, or I’ll delete the lot and that would achieve nothing.
Breakfast was mush, egg and bacon in butter as normal with a lovely cuppa.
Lunch will probably be roast chicken legs with some fruit
dinner, beef grillsteaks with greens. looking forward to that.
I can’t weigh myself, I can’t even really measure myself. I’ve managed to measure wrist, above elbow, neck, knee and nipple to nipple but the tape measure won’t go around my body – am literally more round than I am tall, which is hugely embarrassing!
Haven’t run the hospital yet, will do so in an hour – but i haven’t heard anything so no news is not bad news.
Hope everyone is well! thank you all for your support, can’t tell you how much it’s appreciated. xxx